How does one be a parent to children of a partner’s previous relationship? Well, you may think it’s easy; and you would be absolutely wrong. Some people think this is an easy job, but it is not. Especially, when the children are not yours, they are their fathers and mothers. Where does that leave the step parent? Well, it should put them in the position to become the children’s friend; however, it does not always work out that way. Sometimes the Biological parent is mean and hurtful to the children’s step parent, other biological parent and sometimes the children as well.
First of all do not fret, there are measures you can take to make life easier in your home, but you need to know some things as you embark on what is sure to be a very involved task. Such as, not allowing the hurtful things said deter you from your role as a step parent, if the children tell you mean things, ignore it. They are testing the waters; it just comes with the territory. Lastly, you should love the children for who they are not where they came from. They are sometimes told negative things to hurt you by the non-custodial parent, it is ok, do not fall in the trap.
These are a few simple things you might want to try before you become angry and bitter about how you are treated. You have to realize, this is not how the children feel, it is about how the other parent feels about the whole situation. With time the children will become familiar with you and your parenting so just go with the flow and take things one day at a time. Everything will be ok, if you love them, they will love you too!